You, my friend, are the next Ansel Adams. You woke up that morning feeling confident that nobody and nothing could stop you from capturing the perfect picture. You mastered the sacred art of photography. You bought all the best gear. You have the latest post-processing software. The world is your oyster, and you are ready for the pearl.

As you stepped out the door, you kissed your partner good-bye as she said: “Good luck, honey.” In a half-smile way, you replied, “Thank you.” A few seconds later, while stepping inside the elevator, you felt extra confident, no luck was needed. Today, you were flying high with the Gods of photography.

You arrived at the trailhead and noticed the rolling clouds on the horizon. No big deal, you thought, I can adapt to any and all situations. Do you really believe Mr. Cartier Bresson only worked with perfect lighting? No way, true mastery comes from being able to transform flat light in gold images, and today you were the alchemist.

You start going up the trail, and the climb seemed to be a little steeper than you had previously expected. That damn 70-300 lens is so heavy, why on earth did I bring that? Today, the mosquitos seemed to have some extra love towards you. Apparently, the exuded confidence you carried in your soul can also work as a bite magnet. But you wouldn’t let that bother you. Jokingly, you thought to yourself, “Today, even the mosquitos want a bite of this little slice of awesomeness.”

You have finally arrived at your destination. The place was packed with tourists. Damn tourists, always ruining the perfect locations with their loudspeakers and plastic bottles. Upon arrival, you wasted no time before you started to scout for places to assemble your tripod. You were hopping from stone to stone like a wild gazelle, and the spectators couldn’t help but envy your ability to move so graciously. As your confidence grew, you started to accept higher risks, longer jumps, smaller landing surfaces – you know, all the things that shouldn’t be done. Suddenly, you face a real challenge, a small, rounded little rock just a few feet away. Your gut, brain, soul, and body were telling you, “Don’t you dare try it.” But today, the only voice you could hear was the sweet voice of your confidence. And confidence was there to provide you all the support you need to engage in that jump. As you got ready to jump, you convince yourself that the only way to grow as a human is by pushing through discomfort – right?

You felt exhilarated and alive as you leaped towards that little, beautiful, rounded, and very slippery rock. The adrenalin was rushing through your body, and you now were convinced that it was a small step to reach the perfect angle and a giant leap to your photography career. As you landed, you felt your foot slipping away, and the ground seemed to be rapidly approaching your face. Involuntarily, you started to flap your arm as in an attempt to fly. Unfortunately, all that commotion attracted the tourist’s attention, and now they have locked their gazes at you – some even got their cellphones ready to record that historical moment.

Now, it was too late to go back. You realized you were going to fall into the water. After a quick mental struggle, you finally accepted that inevitable reality. Facing that imminent reality, you decided to address the next pressing topic: “How can I save my camera?” At that exact moment, you realized that hopscotching through wet rocks like a little boy in a schoolyard is not an activity that should be performed while carrying an expensive camera in your hand. You can’t help but feel a profound sense of despair. The thought that your beloved camera might crack because of your silly choice was killing you inside. At that moment, you couldn’t find enough bad words to fed the flowing stream of mental curses – How can I be so stupid? In the midst of all that mental cursing, you remembered the tourists – some even little children – watching and recording that moment on their cellphones. You, as a model citizen, decided to keep the whole ordeal PG 13 – damn tourists.

The moment was finally here, and it was time to face the music. You were going down, and nothing could stop you now. But, the eternal fighter in you still had one last trick up your sleeve. In one of those moments of physical prowess, you were able to perform a contortionist act to save your camera. You landed in a position that would puzzle the most advanced Cirque Du Solei contortionist. As you (sort of) bridged over two small rocks, you were able to hold your camera up high with one arm while keeping yourself above the water by using the remaining limbs. As you tried to stand up (or at least transition to a more dignified position), you felt the little rocks shaking underneath your feet. From contortionist to equilibrist, you were making your way through the circus cast fast. Hopefully, your next role will be of a magician, because it would take a magic trick for you to get out of that situation with some dignity.

As you kept trying to balance yourself in those two (very) unstable stones, unexplainably, your mind decided to take a detour and reveal a mystery of physics that has haunted you since high-school – the concept of relativity. See, you were stuck there for less than five seconds, but it felt like an eternity. You could feel your arms starting to shake, and your body gradually getting heavier by the second. “- Why didn’t I keep the new year’s resolution to start my calisthenics’ workout?” With every passing second, the arm shake got more visible. Now, it was just a matter of seconds before you collapse like an old barn with weak posts.

Facing the pressing reality, you were still trying to concatenate a plan that would help you out of that degrading situation. But it was all to no avail. As you start to get tired, the smile you have kept for the tourist’s cameras fades away. Time was ticking, and you were ready to give up, but suddenly a last glimpse of hope. You see a friendly face approaching. At that point, you were prepared to swallow your pride and accept any stranger’s help. You sighed in relief as you start imagining that friendly hand helping you out that humiliating position. But, a few seconds later, you notice them detouring from your direction Apparently, the stranger decided against finishing your public show of contortionism/equilibrist. The stranger understood that the show must go on, and the tourists must be entertained at all cost – damn tourists.

In a sort of twisted torture, the cold-water running underneath was a constant reminder of your inevitable future. You were going to get wet, and at that moment, you finally realized that was no point in prolonging the suffering. Almost as a dare to the universe, you decided that if you had to go down, at least you would go down on your own terms. Carefully, you start to lower your body, and you lose your breath as your buttocks suddenly touched the cold water. Despite the cold, it felt good to be in control of your life once again. This moment of control boosted your confidence, and you start to think to yourself, “- Yes, boy, you got this.” At that stage, you were convinced that the worse has passed and that from that moment forward, everything would be smooth sailing.

It seems like you never learn, do you? If that’s one thing that history has taught us throughout the centuries, is that a bad situation can always get worse. As soon as your confidence sips back into your soul and that false sense of security settles in, you feel the little rock moving away from your hand. You can’t believe the betrayal. That small rock that supported you during the whole ordeal had now decided to rub salt in the wound. At that moment, during the peak of your dismay, you let escape a loud and decisive “FUCK ME.” The silence after that scream didn’t last long, as all the tourists around you start to giggle while (still) pointing their cameras at you – damn tourists.

As a sinking sail ship, you were partially engulfed by the cold water. And similarly, to a ship’s mast, that keeps fighting against destiny while the water drags the hull down to the bottom of the ocean, you fight to keep one arm straight up out of the water. This arm is the only hope you have to save your beloved camera.

The freezing water makes you gasp for air. But that momentary frigid embrace helps to keep your mind from the pain of hitting your coccyx on a sharp rock. Now, with a bruised ego – and coccyx – you scrambled to get up and put it all away in the past. Concerned, onlookers finally decided to check if you were okay. You decided against a verbal response, as you were afraid the only words that could come out of your mouth were not suitable to be said in public. What would the tourists think of you should you start cursing like an old sailor? – those damn tourists.

However, the story was different inside your head. It seemed like the dam that was holding back the curses finally came down, and you were livid with the photography Gods.

You screamed, “-I’m okay,” as you scrambling to stand up. You just wanted to forget that moment and quickly move away from the spotlight. Now, on solid land, you timidly shake your head, brush off your shoulders, and let a loud “pfff,” out to reinforce that nothing out of the ordinary has happened there.

Wet, cold, and carrying a brand-new bruised coccyx – you walked away and never looked back. But, as you start vanishing on the horizon, you keep hearing the claps – those damn tourists.